• Changing approval seeking behaviour

• Shift it with lemon!

Changing Approval Seeking Behaviour

Even as I am considering the words to write to you, I am falling into the pithole of today's topic: People pleasing, approval seeking, wanting to be seen as clever, wise, nice. It has a few names but in the end it is about 'other approval'.

At Christmas, I received the lovely gift of a pack of cards: WELL-BEING: The teachings of Abraham.

What a delight and source of inspiration they are! Here is the card I drew today, see how it inspired the topic for today:


Seeking approval of others hinders my JOYOUSNESS.

If the way you feel depends on anything outside of you, You're in trouble - but if you depend only upon your connection with your own Inner Being, then everything in your experience falls into alignment.


When we were children, we were really wise. We lived in the moment and played with abandon and joy. We had little judgment and found wonder in everything we saw. Our hearts were open and pure. We were aware that we had been created unique and that we had great gifts to share with the world.

Sadly, very early in life we learned to lie. We let go of our natural knowing because it was not okay with others and we did not want to be different or earn their displeasure. As children, we were constantly seeking to 'belong'. Thus, we learned to pretend to be someone that we were not. It was much safer to be the person we were expected to be. We learned how to not be 'selfish' and put others first. We learned to apologise for almost everything and every way of being.

Society quickly teaches us that love is not unconditional.

So we become people pleasers because we think that's what we need to do to survive.

Slowly, what others think about us becomes incredibly important and we start looking for approval outside of ourselves. We become masters at comparing ourselves to others and seek perfection according to external parameters beyond our control. Once we have learned these lessons, our lives have become miserable most of the time.

Every time we have to do something or go somewhere, we have a memory bank in the subconscious supplying us with reasons to dress this way or behave that way... all of it conditioned responses. There is very little left of our spontaneous, inspired self. We even find it difficult to connect with our Inner Being!

Because of this intensive negative training which has been going on for all of our lives, it takes some work to return to our natural childlike state of grace. Reconnecting with the Source part of ourselves for our moment-to-moment guidance can only achieve this when we let go of our memories.

This process is called Ho'oponopono and you can gain more insight about it here.

Health & Wellbeing


Lemon essential oil is a delightful oil to use every day. Here's how it can help you shift things:

1. It is a very powerful cleanser

• Use it to disinfect countertops, appliances and bathroom fixtures. Just a drop to your damp cloth and wipe down your surfaces. Or put 3 to 10 drops in a bottle with 1 cup of distilled water and spritz before wiping.

• . Use it to sanitize your dishes by adding a drop to your washing-up water or your dishwasher detergent.

• Use it to purify the air and get rid of bad odours with a nebulizer or other diffuser to which you just add 2 to 3 drops with water.

2. It's a mood lifter and balancer. Good for anxiety, brain fog, depression, grief, sadness, stress and lack of vitality.

• Put 1 to 5 drops in a tablespoon of carrier oil (grape seed or any light oil) and massage into your feet.

• Give yourself a revitalising foot bath by adding 3 to 5 drops to warm water. Relax and enjoy!

May 2012 begin the journey of living from the Divine inspiration of your Inner Being so your life can be joyous, peaceful and inspired.

Stay in the NOW and smell the lemons :)

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Blessings, Peace and Love